The Saddest World
by Cruel Reality
Summary: Songfic, oneshot. Hiro loves Shuichi, but knows that he will never have him. It saddens him to watch how no matter how much Shuichi is hurt, he always goes back to his abusive lover for more.


**Authors note;** This is an old song fic that I wrote when I first began to read Gravitation. This was when I supported the Hiro x Shuichi couple. Its not as good as my other Gravi song fic, but I think that it is okay. The ending sounds rushed and kind of sucks but tell me what you think.

Also, I have been hearing people say something about lyrics not being allowed on if someone knows if I violated something here please tell me so that I can fix it.

**Disclaimer;** I do not own Gravitation! The song is **The Saddest Girl** by** Starting Line**, so I do not own the rights to them, never will either.

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**THE SADDEST WORLD**

Song; The Saddest Girl, by Starting Line. (song fic)

**by Cruel Reality**

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_So it's safe to say that we've been here before;  
Heart torn out, down for the count and still come back for more._

Hiro sat down on the floor next to his best friend Shuichi. Dried tear trails impaired his normally perfect face, his normally bright eyes were closed, red, and puffy.

Shuichi was lying down on Hiro's old futon curled up under a blanket; Hiro slowly moved his fingers through his best friend's pink hair, as if trying to sooth the smaller one's dreams. Hiro tightly closed his eyes, as he held back his feelings on just what was happening.

It hurt him deeply to see his friend like this…and he did so constantly. Shuichi had found his way to Hiro's floor quite often lately, and many, many times before that.

Yuki had seemingly broken his heart. Again. Shuichi had come over crying silently, his eyes pleading for entrance to his house. And as so many times before Hiro had simply stepped aside and allowed his friend to enter the only safe haven around.

Shuichi was normally so bubbly, so completely full of life, he was normally like that except for the times after he had had a fight with Yuki…

Yuki…Hiro had really come to hate that name. The only person who could make his friend cry so easily. The only person who would want to make him cry. Shuichi died a little every time that Yuki kicked him out, and it hurt Hiro to know that he could do nothing about it with out hurting Shuichi more. It hurt Hiro that Shuichi constantly let himself get hurt like this.

But what hurt him the most is that no matter how many times Yuki did this to his lover. No matter what he said, or how much those words hurt. No matter how many pieces his heart had broken into Shuichi would always go back to him…

He would go back, simply to be used, abused, and tossed back to Hiro.

Hiro loved Shuichi, he always had…though his feelings were never quite as strong as they were now. But seeing his friend like this re-awoke feelings that he had hid away many years ago. Him, seeing his friend so venerable, broke his heart as well.

_This lesson is learned too well.  
Though, only unlearned by the time your wounds have healed._

Yuki would kick out the singer, tell him never to come back. That was some kind of code to Shuichi to wait a bit, and return when his lover had cooled down. If Yuki had ever actually meant what he said about Shuichi never returning, he never fought back when Shuichi would pop back up on his door mat.

So Shuichi would cry after being kicked out, walk over to Hiro's, cry some more, then return soon after.

Both Shuichi and Hiro were used to this routine, neither questioned nor talked about it however.

Shuichi would tell the guitarist everything, repeatedly tell Hiro…or more or rather himself that he would not return this time. That he had had enough, that it was over.

He told himself that he deserved better. But neither believed Shuichi, minutes later he would break down crying, wondering what he had done wrong to deserve Yuki's punishment.

Being nothing but a friend Hiro could do nothing but sit back and try to comfort him like a friend should. Like it was expected.

Hiro wanted to tell Shuichi to never go back, to leave his lover, to start over. But he knew that the pink haired boy loved Yuki much too much to ever do that. They both knew that Shuichi would take any abuse thrown his way, simply out of love.

They both knew that Shuichi would return as soon as he could.

_Have you had enough?  
I guess not because your lips are stuck to his._

Hiro watched Shuichi leave his apartment running back to Yuki. Hiro wanted to laugh but he knew it was wrong.

Of course Hiro knew that once again Shuichi would leave and go back to the abuse. He walked right into it. He would never under stand how Shuichi could take all of that. Hell, he could never understand why he could take all of this.

How had his friend not broken yet?

How had he not broken yet? He only saw Shuichi now-a-days during work and when he came crying to him. He was selfish he knew, but he still felt that he should see his friend for more then just this. He helped him the best that he could, but it was never enough seeing as how Shuichi still came back after the day was done.

Shuichi must be really strong if he could always return to that…monster, only to be hurt.

_It's Time to say enough is enough, you would be so better off.  
You love him but tough because it's not coming back from him._

Hiro walked out to his balcony and sat in the chair that he had set out there. Staring out over the world he could catch the last of Shuichi running 'home' before he disappeared past the hill.

He had never understood how Shuichi had given his love to him when he obviously didn't return it. Hiro was sure that was irony in some way. Yuki really gave a rat's ass about Shuichi, it was doubtable that that man even knew what love was let alone how to feel it.

Shuichi, Hiro thought, should move on, find someone else. It would be better for him in the long run. No more hurt from his abusive lover, no more nights spent crying, no more heart break. He needed to be strong he needed to get a life. Shuichi had to realize that there was more for him out there, Shuichi should have some one better. Some one who could love him for who he was…

Some one…like him.

Hiro laughed bitterly to himself. Imagine, him telling Shuichi these things. He needed to first tell himself this. He loved Shuichi, but alas it was unreturned.

Letting go was something that Hiro needed to learn, Shuichi could find better, he could find someone not stuck on a lost love.

_You can't win._

In the game of love there was no winners. Only losers, and the rest whom were left broken. Hiro wondered where he would fall eventually.

Shuichi wouldn't win Yuki completely.

Hiro would never even have Shuichi.

There are no winners.

_Stop expecting change, he's just a lost cause that you're waiting on._

Yuki was dead inside, he couldn't love Shuichi the way he needed. But Shuichi would wait forever for him, for him to love him. Hiro understood that commitment more then most would think.

Yuki loved a shadow, he was too deeply scarred to heal, and he was lost in the past. He was unable to return and live in the present. He was a shadow, shadows don't change. They can grow, they can change shape, but they always revert back to what they were before. Something not real, following closely after someone.

It was simply a shadow of some one, not really them- not really not. Something that hid in the darkness, the light making it disappear.

Shuichi was waiting for the shadow to break away, Hiro knew that Yuki wouldn't. Shuichi would be waiting forever, forever for a shadow.

The guitarist was the same way, but Shuichi wasn't like a shadow, he had light inside of him, he didn't live in the dark. He was more like a dog. Extremely loyal, lovable, and desperately seeking attention. Someone could walk all over him, the dog would walk away with his tail between his legs and come back later.

Hiro had taken in a stray dog, it needed him for comfort at the moment. But after time had past it would be loyal and return to its master. Hiro was just the second family, the one that feed him, and in a way gave it its only love.

_Take a look around, you could have anyone.  
So leave undeserving him._

So many people loved Shuichi, and not just because he was a rock star. So many would give there left leg just to have one dinner with him.

If he tried Shuichi could have anyone, there was so many.

Why did he stay with Yuki? The love excuse could only work for so long, love could only bring you so far.

Yuki didn't deserve him. Yuki didn't see him for the treasure that he was. He only saw him as a toy…it could easily break but he didn't care. He played around with it as much as he wanted, and tossed it after he was done.

Shuichi could have so much more then what he had right now….but he didn't go that extra mile to get it.

_It only hurts at first.  
But then you will find someone to give you everything you want.  
Try not to go running back to him._

Lounging at NG the next week, him and Suguru were waiting for their singer. He was already half of an hour late, but that was normal.

The door slowly opened and in walked a broken looking Shuichi. Kei-san immediately started to question him, but Hiro just needed to look in his eyes. Shuichi had not come to his apartment the night before, and that look in his eyes was so much sadder then usually. It was big this time.

Hiro then tried to tell him that the pain wouldn't last all that long, that it would be better in the end. Shuichi just nodded his head, pretending to agree with his best friend.

It was different this time, Shuichi had walked out on _him_.

Hiro could only hope that Shuichi had enough control not to crack instantly and rush back into the devils hands.

Hiro invited Shuichi to live with him.

Maybe now Shuichi would see how much better off he was with out his bastard lover. He could finally be happy if he wanted, do as he wished. He was able to be his own person, not try desperately to please that man. Hopefully now he could be strong enough to be himself. He was now free to find some one else, some new love.

So, maybe now he could see just how much his friend really loved him.

_So it goes unsaid that we've been here before.  
Lonely nights and endless fights and sleeping on the floor._

Shuichi lasted a week.

One week before he went crawling back to that…lover. One week before Shuichi was back at Hiro's door, teary eyed, and begging to be let in.

It was all rather familiar.

Shuichi really felt that he was alone. Those few nights that he wasn't kicked out by Yuki he ended up sleeping on the couch or in the corner floor. All they ever did was fight. Hiro couldn't stand to see him like this….again.

Hiro sat next to Shuichi as he slept like so many nights before this. Hand stroking the pink locks, wondering how his friend could do this, how he could do this.

He had thought that Shuichi was strong enough to be with out that man.

_  
And he's sorry, so the story goes.  
It's read and replayed and ends the same way_

When things got really, REALLY bad, Yuki would 'apologize.' It was never real, Yuki knew that, Hiro knew that, every one knew that. Every one really, but Shuichi, the one person that should.

With that one word Shuichi would jump back into his arms, leaving Hiro's. And things moved on…

Well, if you could call it that, it was all one repeat. Shuichi would cry after being kicked out, walk over to Hiro's, cry some more, then return soon after. Nothing ever really changed. What was that saying? "The world isn't one damn thing after another, it's one damn thing over and over again." Hiro couldn't remember who said it first, but who ever did was one wise man.

Hiro loved him, at the times after Shuichi would leave he could begin to convince him self other wise, to move on. But seeing as history repeats its self, when ever Shuichi came crying to him, his feelings would re-awaken.

Both of them were able to hold on some how, loving things that never could be.

_Stop expecting change, he's just a lost cause that you're waiting on.  
Take a look around, you could have anyone.  
So leave undeserving him._

Shuichi Shindou loved a shadow, something that couldn't change if it wanted too. You could wait and wait for it but it would always follow that same person. But that person wasn't Shuichi. Even though so many loved him he couldn't leave.

Hiroshi Nakano loved a dog. A dog whom was extremely loyal to its master, who could never leave him. Coming to Hiro when he needed him, eating his food, excepting his company, his love. Only to leave as soon as his master snapped his fingers. Not giving a second look to those who really care, who really loved him.

Both were stuck in a sad little world, and sad little lives, loving those who would never return it. But they moved on, they replayed everything everyday. They held on, they still lived. Even if it wasn't the way that they wanted it to be.

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**Authors note;** Does the ending seem rushed? I think so. But any ways PLEASE REVIEW!


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